Love's bane

The beginning of this week has been a total downer. I don’t know what it is with women and me. This lament is nothing new of course, in the sense that it’s something that ails most men in this world. I mean… is it about me that puts women off so much? They’re fine for as long as we speak on the phone… and then when we meet… *BAM* ttylkthxbai. It’s very very depressing. This Saturday I spent at a conference conducted at the Ceylon chamber of commerce. There’s a new lady in the finance department who has caught my eye in a most unusual manner. I say unusual because it has been many years since I felt this way for a lady. Anyway, this lady was attending the same conference, and by sheer luck sat opposite me on the other side of the table. I spent the next 8 hours furtively glancing in her direction. Sometimes I’d catch her looking at me, at the time I thought maybe she was checking me out, but I realized later that she was probably looking at me with the curiosity that one looks at a corpse that just dropped in front of them. She even smiled back at me, the one or two times I dared to. One of my techies also talks with her, through the corporate instant messenger service, so he and I share everything she says to us. I sent her a text message yesterday, and she never replied to it. She had however told my techie that she would ask me not to text her, but I received no such message and she hadn’t sent one it seems. So I don’t know the story is there. And now, as I type this she’s still ignoring me on instant messenger. I think she’s hoping if she ignores me for long enough that I’ll leave her alone. But I’d like her to say it to me, instead resorting to the cold shoulder technique. I think she owes me that much at least, I’m a big boy I can handle the rejection. Anyway, the longer I think about this the more depressed I get, especially when I know that she’s lying to me and chatting with the guy next to me. Oh yeah, she lied to me this morning saying that she was busy, when in fact she is still chatting with my techie. I have no qualms with him, he and I are tight and we help each other mutually. There’s obviously something very wrong with me to put women off in such a manner. It’s really fucking depressing. This whole week is going to be bad. And to top things off, my cousi’s wedding will be on the 16th and I’ll be leaving on the 15th for it, so more depressive situations for me to look forward to. Fun fun fun. I would love to enjoy this week in a coma. I truly would. And wake up next Monday. That would be perfect. We should have these things where we can be put into suspended animation at will. That would be great. Imagine staving off arguments for centuries. Feh, I’m full of shit and angst today. The only good thing about this week is that I’ll only have to work today and tomorrow. I think I might just confront this lady soon i.e. tomorrow and get the hold thing over with. I think I’d at least deserve the decency to be told that she doesn’t want to have anything to do with me instead of THIS. Why are some women such bitches?
Peace.